Only child – selfish, arrogant in itself, with a great sense of self-worth and a big ego – a child. Such a stereotype of a child brought up without siblings, prevails in Poland. Today, it is less severe than for the past, but further teachers, other adults, sometimes extended family, they look at only child, as a child of another category. It is common vision that such a child is selfish, unable to share, lacks interpersonal skills, and to all that is in love with each other, to the ears of parents who do not see his flaws and mistakes. This results in letting the child at all, by a lack of consistency.
Jedynakach myths about so many as there are only children in the world.
Most of them still comes down to making the child selfish beings. However, rather than criticize parents parenting mistakes, you should look at the situation from a different angle. Now, parents who have one child, pour your love on them, because they are just one of them. If the number of children was greater, the natural thing would be the division of attention. Equally natural thing in this case is to direct all their attention on one child, if you have one of them. This is not an invention of the parents, but the natural mechanism which, by the evolution in the context of culture, has created a damaging stereotypes.
Nevertheless, the only child education is not easy.
There is a fine line between one extreme to another. Between education egoist gazing at each other, and introverted, without self-esteem of man. To prevent one and the other extreme, you may want to keep a balance. The only child education is particularly important. It should reveal the fact that the only son should be in contact with their peers and adults at the same time.
Child raised without siblings, every day is the same.
Associates among adults, which is an advantage, as it often grows faster than for peers. Sometimes more reasonable and prudent, which protects them from danger. Nevertheless, we should not forget about the child’s contact with other peers. It teaches them interpersonal contacts. The child feels equal, in the literal sense of the word. Among adults, the parents, the child feels that he is above them, since they dominate over him, which is natural, because they are responsible for it. However, if the child no contact with their peers, grows into a small, helpless creature who thinks he can not cope in life. When I provide her contact with other children, we put him in a situation where it will just have to deal with. The conflict over a toy, speaking their own right, the fun – the child will add confidence. Of course, this only child also needs the support of parents, in such contacts. Parents should serve good advice, not a lecture, as a child throws into guilt.
Another important issue in the education of an only child is consistency.
Raising more children, it also is important, however, the easier it is to keep parents, even through experience. Parents only child, very often they are not consistent. This is due to thinking that harm the child who is crying and the rebels. Nothing could be further from the truth, because there are no specific rules makes the child begins to feel lost. It is not important whether it is an only child, and has five siblings. Child raised without losing a sense of security rules. In the case of an only child, this may cause a serious deficit of self-esteem.
Overprotection is also a feature attributed to the parents of an only child.
While it is natural to transfer their interest for one child, if they have one. This overprotection is no longer natural. Hand in hand with the lack of consistency, makes the young man grows up to be a person with a lack of a sense that he will cope. Dependent, throughout childhood from parents, the non-stop adult life needs attention of others. This raises the morale and makes her feel better. She can not imagine life without the attention of others. This is an unfair approach to life, because people do not always take the same role in our lives, what we would like.
To avoid falling into extreme, manifested in the education of young, ambitious and self-confident man who did not have any feelings in themselves, which means that is guided by selfishness, surround, from an early age, the child love. Unconditional love, which is manifested by the fact that parents are always on the side of the child, supporting and loving it. Respect from an early age, the child is also a manifestation of love. Respecting his mind and behavior, teach him respect for each other and the world. Of course, the love of parents who love the “headless” also hurts. However, the golden mean lies in loving and still learning. Instead, teach, give your child the council. Instead forgive him, demanding the limits of its capabilities. Love and respect, from the first days of his life. And to top it all show him the world, rather than protect it before it obsessively, because the child locked in a cage, and enter into adulthood, zachłystanie the world, which may not be a pleasant experience for him.
Education only child, contrary to appearances, not harder, than raising brood of children. It’s the same work, differing only in the child’s attitude and driving through life. In the absence of having siblings, child mimics you or peers. Therefore, to show him the world, and to bring them up to a good man, should he so choose the items included in his daily life, to be able to learn as much as possible of life. Of course, in a safe manner. Protection at any cost, in the long run will not work, because every child grows and emerges from the slot. A duty of parents is to prepare them the best for the job.